Why Me? Why Write? Why Now? Why Not?

The Me is Doug Curran…Douglas M Curran…Douglas Metcalf Curran. Douglas is Celtic for “dweller by the dark stream”. Curran in Gaelic means “little spear”. And Metcalf? Scottish for “I met a calf”? Hey I don’t know! I don't have all the answers. I'm still trying to get the questions right. At least I seem to be a spear fisher by some dirty water. Or maybe I'm a Druid. And that Curran thing may not even be as Irish as my Irish American wife, Colleen Fitzsimmons, hoped it was when she married me. Ok, I might be a Viking. It's like this. I was reading this book, The Lion Of Ireland, see, and the author, Morgan Llewellyn, recounts a last battle between Brian Boru and the Viking invader king, to regain Irish dominance again throughout the island and kick the fureners out. The Viking king's name? Olaf Cuaran? Cuaran? Curran? I'm a Viking now, so I am? And a descendent of one of those marauding and murderous pillagers and plunderers? I've never pillaged a thing in my life...well, maybe a book or two from somebody. I'm really just a gentle giant who loves books and music. Ok, I bought a sword recently, but only as a wall decoration to enhance my Irish family history coat of arms! Honest! Viking, Schmiking, so rest my Irish soul! Or my wife will have my old bald Irish head!

June 22, 2009

Father's Day...

Had our annual family gathering Sunday around this old father and one father/son, Shane. I appreciated the gifts and cards of kind remembrance. I could say it was one more exercise in guilt for all the fathering I didn't do out of bumbling trial and error and ignorance, but got better at with my grandkids than with my own kids perhaps. I could say fatherhood is a gift I didn't deserve, though I always wanted to be one - and got lucky when a beautiful woman who married me also wanted to have kids with me and be a mother many times over. I could say that having kids is not the same as fathering kids, that it's not as instinctive as mothering, but equally as rewarding when given a chance. I could talk about the encroaching fatherless in today's sick society where over a third of all kids are being raised without a father - and it's getting worse. I could talk about my own father who worked two jobs to support us and who I should have honored more. I could talk about a successful man who said that his greatest title in life was father and that his work titles and degrees were insignificant when compared with being called "Dad". I'm just glad I've had the experience and probably will never stop fathering my kids, though not in the same way. Thanks to Colleen for the amazing c0operative effort and to our mortally clothed eternal spirits, made blessedly more in her image than mine - Quinn, Megan, Shane, Erin, Shannon, Caitilin, Sean and Conn, who have taught me more about fathering than any book ever could.

1 comment:

  1. I'm glad you had a good Father's Day. You've taught me more then you'll ever know, and I'm so grateful for all the lessons you've taught me about life; being kind to others, respecting our Mom. You and Mom taught us to love music, and helped us on our way to learn different instruments. I'm especially thankful that you taught me how to play the guitar. I love you, Dad. Thanks for everything!!